Until recently, you were still a baby in so many ways to me. But now, you are 19 months old and suddenly truly a toddler. You used to rely completely and totally on me. Helpless. We did everything together; sleep, cry, eat. You were almost an extension of me. But now I see that you are gaining independence and that you are becoming your own person.


You have big and scary feelings, many that happen all at once. You have opinions that often clash with one another. You are developing likes and dislikes, dreams and fears, and your memory improves daily. You want to see, explore, taste, touch, smell, throw, and play with everything that is around you. You still want the comfort of mother when it all becomes too much. You are you in every way.

This is difficult for both of us. As you transition from infancy to childhood, there are so many things to learn about the world around you. There are so many things to learn about yourself. You will frustrate me over and over, but I will patiently help you to understand. You will assert your independence from me, but I will remain your rock and your home base. You will take out those scary feelings on me, but I will remain your source of unconditional love.

In so many ways, you are still my baby. You nurse, you stay up all night, you just want to be held. But I am seeing sparks of you as a child. You are talking to me and repeating words. You love to play outside. You have a sense of humor. You want to do everything yourself.


During this transition, this scary, awkward, emotional, and difficult transition, there is something that I know we are both sure of. That you will always be my son, my sun, my earth, my moon, my stars, my everything.


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